Have I found an answer......?

I think I may have figured out why I've been feeling so weird about this race. I think my psyche is having trouble reconciling the run/walk technique with my competitiveness. When I run in a race, I've always tried to do my best and shoot for age group wins/placings. Now I've started doing this run/walk technique - I have really loved doing them on my long runs and I think it will be a necessity for this first marathon where my goal is to just finish. If, after the MCM, I decide to continue to run in marathons, one of my goals may be to run the whole thing and then eventually finish by a certain time, shoot for PRs etc. But for this first one it is just to finish and I think my brain will be OK with that technique during the race but for this one I'm struggling. I know I can run 10 miles and I always love to shoot for age group runs in my 15K in the fall (not all that much different in distance) so I think my head wants to do the same for this race. I'm actually thinking about combining the 2 attitudes: run the first half of the course using the run/walk technique and then for the last half of the race try to run it straight and see what time I can get. I'm just going to see how I feel tomorrow and go with it!

I was able to sit down and talk with Donna yesterday about Tim. The more I learn about what happened to him, the more it scares me. He has a condition called Primary Antiphospholipid Syndrome (PAPS) which is also called Hughes Syndrome. Basically what happens is the body produces antibodies that attach themselves to the fat cells in the body (the phospholipids) and together they cause clots to form in the body. The clots can form anywhere - his formed near his heart so he had a heart attack. It could have just as easily formed in his brain and he could have had a stroke. He was healthy and took great care of himself - he had no control over the situation. He was a ticking time bomb and never knew it. There are tests to check for the antibodies but, especially when there aren't any symptoms, it isn't something anyone would ever think to check for. Now that they know he has the condition, it is treatable but because of the damage it caused over the years, he needed the new heart and has all sorts of other problems to deal with. He is a very amazing person and I think I'm going to get a chance to meet him in a couple of weeks. I am VERY excited about that - I will also gather up more details about him and post that at a later date.

I'm (with the help of friends and family) coming up with many great ideas on how to raise money. I don't really know how many people actually read my blog, but if anyone out there reads this and is interested in helping Tim's cause please feel free to contact me and let me know. I will be creating a bank account under a name like "Run for Tim" so no one will have to worry about me keeping the money. That is actually something that has been worrying me - I don't want people to be afraid that I'm just going to take this money. Tim needs it so badly and I just want to help! I'm thinking about making some silicone bracelets and selling them as well as making up some T-shirts. The idea for the T-shirt is twofold - for those willing to donate a certain amount (haven't set the amount yet) they will get their names on the back of the shirt and receive a shirt and those that can't quite manage that level could just buy a basic shirt. No designs have been created or finalized yet but I'm excited about the idea (both of them).

I made Julie B's brownies yesterday and she was right they are AMAZING! They are most definitely going into the end of year gift packs. I'm stopping at a supply store today to get boxes and then will get them packaged up and out of the house as soon as I can! I can't imagine how many calories are in each piece - truth is, I don't want to know (LOL)!! The recipe says it makes 20 big brownies but I am cutting them up into little pieces because they are unbelievably rich and sweet.

I'm also going to pick up my race packet today. This is actually the first race that I will pick up the packet before the day of the race - just something else to add to the newness of the situation. I'm also taking my daughter to a birthday party today. She was invited to a roller skating party. Finally, my husband needs to go into work for a while in the early evening (I may have to leave the party a touch early in order to get home). Not really the nice restful day I would have planned on the day before a long race. But it is life and I love it!

Until tomorrow!

Thursday 5/17/07

Today was a pretty average day. I went out for a nice easy 3 mile run (only ran about 2.6 because of a bathroom stop). It actually felt a bit empty, probably because I had a purpose during the tempo run and none here. It is nice when you can just let your mind wonder (and my mind was on Tim and all the things I want to do with the fundraiser) but it just didn't feel "right". I don't mean to say that it was a bad run because I felt good during the whole run. It was just a mental thing.

Tomorrow is a rest day and I think I'm going to do just that. Sometimes I will do a cross-training session on my rest days but with the race on Sunday, I think I rest today and maybe go out for a walk on Saturday. I'm getting excited about Sunday but nervous at the same time. It's weird because I've run 15Ks before without any problem - so what makes this race any different? I know I'm in great shape so that isn't the reason. I guess it is because I'm going to use the run-walk technique but that isn't going to stop me from finishing it would only make it easier. I don't know! Maybe it is just because so much is going on in my life right now that I'm worrying about anything and everything.

Off to plan for tomorrow - going to make the brownie recipe that Julie B. posted in her blog tomorrow. If it turns out well (and I know it will) I'm going to put it in my end of school year gifts.

Wednesday 5/16/07

I had a great run this morning! It was a 35 minute Tempo run - I did 10 minutes warm-up, 15 minute run and 10 minute cool down. I covered 4.5 miles and I was consistently in the 7 - 8 m/m range during the run part of the workout. The overall pace was 8:16m/m. I will say that my legs were feeling a bit tired after the run (while I was making breakfast and getting ready for school etc.). But have felt better as the day has progressed.

I went to a women's sports store and bought a new pair of running shoes today. I realized that my current pair has well over 300 miles on them. I will be using both sets of shoes for a little while. Then when the next version of the Asics Gel-Cumulus comes out I will try to get this earlier model at a discounted price.

After I got my shoes, Will and I stopped at a park and walked/ran on some trails. He has amazing amounts of energy! I can't believe how well he handles those types of activities, especially considering he is only 4. I'm really looking forward to being able to take the kids to the parks during the day (after school lets out). They both seem to love walking on the trails so I want to encourage it as much as I can!

Time to go pick up Ally from school!

Tuesday 5/15/07

Things are going well with my training and my eating. Yesterday was a "perfect" day! I was able to do a Cardio Coach workout and I followed my nutrition plan to a tee.

Today was a 3.5 mile run. I was a bit tired when I got up this morning which is normal because I'm up late Monday nights. I've really enjoyed the class I'm taking, and have learned a great deal, but boy does it wear me out on Tuesday mornings. However, I did get myself out and had a good run. I went 3.8 miles and ran it at a pace of 8:30m/m

Today was also our last gym day of the school year. I can't believe that we only have a little more than a week left of school. My little girl will be graduating from the school (our school goes through kindergarten) - I'll have to put her on a bus next year and send her to a different school. I'm not sure how I'm going to deal with that but I'll just take it one step at a time.

Speaking of one step at a time, my 10 miler is just 5 days away. I'm really looking forward to it! Packet pick-up starts Saturday at 11am and the race begins at 7:10am on Sunday (the marathon starts at 7am). Even as I sit here ant write about it, the nerves start to tingle. I am going to use the run/walk technique but I'm also going to try and push the pace while I'm running. I think I'll use a Gatorade and water combo for fuel during the race. I've had GU once but I don't want to risk it messing with my stomach during the race. My goal for the race to to maintain 8m/m and finish in a time of 1:20:00. Last October, I ran the 15K at a 7:30m/m pace so I think the 8 is doable. Only time will tell.......until tomorrow!

Sunday 5/13/07

Happy Mother's Day to all those Moms out there!

I had a great day yesterday playing with the kids in the pool (at a birthday party). They have progressed a lot since the start of last summer. I can't wait to get them to the pool this year and start their swim lessons. I have no doubt that they will be little fish by the end of the summer!

All the playing in the pool really took its toll though - I was exhausted last night! I was in bed at 9pm and pretty much fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. I got up this morning as usual but it was raining and I was still pretty tired. So, I laid down on the sofa for about 2 hours and then got up and did my run. I went about 3.5 miles and my pace was 8:12m/m. I felt like a really easy pace so I was surprised to see the 8:12 when I was finished - it just didn't feel like I was going that fast.

I'm really looking forward to next weekend. I will pick up my race packet on Saturday and then the race begins at 7:10 am. I am going to stick to my workout plan for the beginning of the week but I'm not sure how I will alter the end of the week. I will be doing either some easy runs or maybe some cross-training. I'll just see how it goes.

Bill got called out for an emergency this morning (at work) so I'm not sure what the rest of the day will be like. I was hoping to go out for lunch but I don't think he is going to be home in time. I guess the kids and I will just eat here. If I don't hear from him soon I may go out and run some errands - it is a beautiful day and I don't really feel like sitting inside all day!

Saturday 5/12/07

I ran 9+ miles today and feel pretty good about the session. My pace was about 8:25m/m and it took me about 1:15 to finish the workout. My knees are a bit creaky this afternoon but overall I feel good. I'm about to take the kids to a birthday party at a pool. I'm hoping to be able to get in with the kids and work my legs out a bit - we'll just have to see how it goes.

Food hasn't been so good the past couple of days and I really need to get back on track. I made my weight goal and my head then tells my body to "celebrate" with a piece of junk. It has happened to me before. I don't want to let it get out of hand! I will also be able to get in some extra cross-training soon. There is only a couple more weeks of school and then we will be able to get to the pool and add in some extra bike workouts.

Off to the birthday party!

I'M IN - IT'S OFFICIAL!!!

I'm entered into the Marine Corp Maration!

I am so excited about this - I don't think I ever thought I would actually ever do a marathon but thanks to Kat for giving me a little nudge I am now going to realize a dream!

It is also giving me the chance to help someone in need. Which makes it all the more special!!

Tuesday 5/8/07

This past weekend was not a fun one. I ended up working my tail off doing homework for class and finishing projects for our Spring Arts Night at school. The worst part was trying to finish one of my homework assignments because I didn't really understand the homework. I worked on it for hours (and I'm not exaggerating) and I still don't think I did it right. At least everyone, in my class, seemed to be equally confused and frustrated. I didn't feel quite as "stupid" when I found out that everyone was struggling.

I didn't realize just how much of an energy drain it was to go through that sort of process. It gives you a look into the world of those that deal with those types of feeling on a daily basis. I was so drained on Monday morning that I did not even exercise. I got up to do it but just couldn't get out the door. Then it was a long day of school and then class in the evening. However, I did get out this morning for a run. It felt really good and started my day off on the right foot.

I'm taking my son to the opthamologist in about 30 minutes. I think he has a sty on his eye lid but it has been acting weird so our family MD suggested we go to an opthamologist. It seems to be coming to a head at this point so I'm hoping it will clear up soon. The good part is that it has really seemed to bother him at all. I just want to get some answers.

Then tonight is Tball. We just got the kids a new bat so I think they will be really excited to use it. We did a bit of hitting in the back yard over the weekend and both the kids did really well. I'll be interested to see how they do when using the T (we were tossing the ball to the kids this weekend).

Times up until next time!

Sunday 5/6/07

I have to admit that I'm a touch bummed this morning. Yesterday was a great day! I had an awesome run and my eating was pretty good. I did have a dinner that was high in sodium so I'm thinking that it was the culprit. I really thought I would make my goal weight this morning but it actually went up a .5 pound. Realistically, I know it is water weight and I'm not overly concerned about it - I was just really excited about the day yesterday and thought I would be at goal today. Such is life, I just have to drink a boat load of water today and just keep on - keepin' on!

On the good side, I got out for my run this morning and my legs felt pretty good. I didn't feel overly tired or sluggish which I think is a good sign that I'm not progressing too fast.

Today will be a busy work day - lots of projects to get done. Unfortunately, all of it is school related (work school and class school). I still have to finish my homework and then finish some work projects for our Spring Arts Night. Luckily, Bill is taking Will to his birthday party and I will have some time to get stuff done. I had originally wanted to take Ally out and do something special but I realised last night that I have A LOT to get finished today AND when I woke up this morning a cold front had moved in and has really kicked up the wind. I don't think we would be very comfortable doing things outside today.

Speaking of birthday parties - I have take my kids to more birthday parties in the last month or so, than I think I attended in my entire life! Everybody has a lot of fun but it takes up a great deal of time and it is getting a touch expensive. Just a bit of a rant!

Off to start my busy day with a childless (my children that is) church service. I'm really looking forward to the quiet time with the Lord - hard to do with the kids sitting next to me trying to get my attention all the time.

Saturday 5/5/07

I had a great run this morning. I ran 8.3 miles and felt great (8:30m/m)! There was only one time when I felt like my legs were a little heavy and I know exactly why it happened. At around 5 miles, I stopped to use the bathroom and when I got going again my legs were feeling a bit tired. The sensation went away pretty quickly though.

The weather is great right now for morning running. It was 47 degrees when I got started so I was a bit chilly at the beginning but I'm able to do the entire run in shorts and a long sleeve shirt. I love when I don't have to put on 100 layers just to get out and exercise. The sunrise was beautiful again today. However, the best part was that I saw a red fox. It probably had babies somewhere close because it was MAD at me! I've never heard a fox make any noise and was very surprised to hear it squawk at me - it sounded a lot like a bird. I was actually afraid for a minute that it might charge at me. I was trying to give it lots of space. The whole incident went off without incident though and boy did it give me a boost - it is very cool to see nature out and about. We (humans) are spreading out so much that seeing things like that have become such a rarity.

Well off to do the rest of my day - I think I'm heading out the door to have a catch with my daughter!

Thursday 5/3/07 & Friday 5/4/07

My legs are starting to feel the fatigue of this week (21.2 miles since Saturday). Tomorrow is a non-running day and I think I will enjoy it. I will probably not exercise in the am and then just do some easy biking in the afternoon. I still have a weight loss goal to reach so I don't want to completely stop exercising but it will definitely be an easy day tomorrow. Saturday is my scheduled long run and I'm shooting for between 7 & 8 miles.

It was definitely a struggle to get out the door this morning but between the weight loss goal and keeping Tim in my thoughts, I was able to get out.

I actually started this entry on Thursday morning and then never got back to it - oh well! Today was supposed to be a rest day and it was pretty much an easy day. I was able to get on the bike for a nice easy spin for about 25 minutes. Tomorrow will be different though! It is my long run day so it will be out the door a little after 5am to go to my Saturday morning path. I have really come to look forward to those runs. I love running and watching the sun start to come up - seeing all the different colors in the sky is just amazing!

It's funny, just last year I was almost afraid to do a run that was in the 8 mile range - and even thinking about a marathon was TOTALLY out of the question. It is amazing how much your body and mind can change in the course of a year. I guess that is the whole point - always striving to push yourself to something new. It doesn't have to be huge like an ultra marathon, it just has to be something new and different and challenging to you.

Wednesday 5/2/07 - Plus

Today was a really good day. We went on a field trip to a theatre today and the kids loved it. There was lots of singing and dancing and they introduced the kids to some really great stories (me too). I don't know which the kids loved more though - the show or the bus ride.

My workouts were also good today. I had my run this morning and then I was also able to get in two 20 minute bike sessions. I'm into crunch time and I have just a touch more weight to lose so that my check doesn't get sent to "the vile" organization next Wednesday. I am also still getting A LOT of inspiration by just thinking about "Running for Tim". I just know this is the right thing to do and because of that fact, I know that I will get into the race. Just 1 more week and I'll know for sure - I'm getting excited just thinking about it.

My director is also going to bring my idea to the church board (our school is sponsored by a Lutheran Church). Any time we want to ask people to help with something like this, we need to ask their permission first. I don't think I'll have any trouble getting them to OK it. That will them give me, hopefully, 3 churches to help support the cause (mine, my parent's and school's). I still need to come up with a dollar figure to shoot for. Julie A., if you read this would you give me some input please. I know you were required to raise a certain amount of money but I can't remember how much that was. I want a number that would really help them out but that isn't going to be absolutely impossible to raise. I'm also not going to have much opportunity to do things like auctions and such.

Well, I guess that is it for today. I'm scheduled for a 3 mile run in the morning. Here's to seeing more weight loss!!

Wednesday 5/2/07

I'm going to try and get back on later with a more detailed post but I'm just excited to say that this week has been going GREAT! My running has felt really good (but my legs are a bit tired this morning), my eating has been MUCH better and the weight has been steadily dropping.

I'm feeling really good!!

Weekend Concerns and Other Stuff

Concern 1 is that my eating has been less than stellar. I'm not sure what is going on. I am so close to my goal of 135# and I was doing really well with my eating and then all of a sudden I find myself eating all this crap. The one thing that has been pretty consistent has been my exercising - the 10K race was such a thrill and then I took it a bit easy for a couple of days but then got right back into it. That leads me to Concern 2 - Saturday I had planned to do a 6 mile run but at about 4.5 miles I started to get this "twinge" in my lower leg. It wasn't a sharp pain and it wasn't really crampy but I decided to do the smart thing and stop running. I walked back to my car and then did some stretching before going home. My exercising is the thing that has been keeping me sane - I couldn't afford to lose it. Luckily, this morning it felt good so I went out for that 6 miler I wanted to run yesterday. It was a good run - not real fast (about 9 m/m) - and I used the run/walk technique. I was glad to get it in.

Now onto better news - I just signed up for The Bell Supply Ten Miler. It is being run in conjunction with the Delaware Marathon. I'm really excited about it for a number of reasons. One, we will begin the race with the marathoners so I will get a feel for what the whole marathon experience will be like. Two, it will be a pretty big race so I will find out what it is like to run in a Big crowd. Finally, the race will be using transponder timing and I've never used that before. I will be a great experience and probably the best part to the whole day will be the fact that it is close to home - I won't have to find a place to stay or anything like that. I will sleep in my bed and eat my own food etc.

Tuesday 4/24/07

I'm feeling pretty good today. Yesterday, my butt was pretty sore as were my groin muscles - not to the point of incapacitation though. I was able to do some body weight lifting yesterday (only doing body weight because my elbow is flared up again and holding the weights increases the soreness) as well as "Action Day" in gym class. Overall I felt yesterday was a good "day after" type of a day.

This morning I woke up and did a 3 miler. I was a little tight at the beginning but really started to loosen up as I went. I'm now moving into my next training program but I'm not sure I want to go with it. I had planned to combine a number of Hal Higdon programs as a build up to my marathon training. However, now that I've built up a good distance base, I don't know if I want to drop it back in miles. My long run would drop all the way back to 5 miles and then take me another month to get back up to the 8 miler that I did a couple of weeks ago. If there is anyone out there that has a suggestion as to how I should/could proceed, I would love to hear from you. I've been running for quite a while but I still haven't mastered the ability of creating my own training programs!

I'm also feeling pretty good about my weight right now. I'm at 137 which is behind schedule on my LL plan but I think I will still be able to make my 135 goal by May 9th! I have a little over 2 weeks and I feel like I can really knock this thing out!

My First 10K is finished!

OK, I didn't win the London Marathon (which is what I believe she is winning in the above picture) but I did win my age group! I couldn't believe it!! And to top it all off I was actually the 2nd woman to finish the entire race (31st overall finisher). The woman who won the race is also a sponsored runner which makes it that much more satisfying!!

It was a beautiful day and like always I was there really early (about 45 minutes before the race). Getting there that early is a good thing and a bad thing - it gives me plenty of time to take care of things like registration, the bathroom, getting all my race gear on, the bathroom and yet again, the bathroom. The bad part is that I don't really like to wait around. Once I'm ready, I want the thing to start - how rude of them to not adhere to MY schedule (LOL)! I think the official temperature at race time was about 66 degrees and boy was the sun shining. You couldn't have asked for a nicer day!

The course was a rolling hill course with a majority of the beginning going downhill and then, of course, the majority of the end was uphill. I started out right behind a group of women that seemed to be holding a pretty nice pace although it was significantly faster than my originally intended pace of between 8:15 and 8:30. But being the competitor that I am I decided to stick with them at least for the first half of the race (remember, it was mostly downhill). I felt good and just went with it. I tried hard not to look at my Forerunner too much because I didn't want to start to panic - I knew it was fast but I figured, as long as I felt reasonably fresh I was going to go for it!

Around mile 2 the group of woman started to break up and that was when I decided to just push ahead. Not too long after that, I found myself running alone. I had left most of them behind and started using a technique I use in every race I run. I pick a person in front of me (preferably a woman) and try to reel her/him in. Once I catch and pass that person I pick another person to chase down and continue that until the end of the race. For me at least, it helps the miles and the pain go faster. You have that immediate goal right in front of you and you can tell if you are getting closer to it or falling behind - it is a great motivator for me during a race!

Then at about the 5K mark I could really feel the fatigue start to set in. At that point, the course had started to move mostly uphill and was getting pretty difficult. I ran with a man for a little bit and confessed to him (after he had commented that I had a nice pace going) that it was significantly faster than I was used to and I wasn't sure if I would be able to maintain it. As I started to pull away, I wished him a good race and he told me to keep the pace going. It wasn't much but it was really nice to hear that positive support from a fellow runner. One of my pet peeves is when runners don't support each other on the road. I'm all for doing your best and striving to win but not at the expense of those around me - but I digress.

Once I got to the 5 mile mark, I knew I was going to make it. My pace might slow in that last mile but there was no doubt that I was going to have a great time at the end of the day. Luckily for me there were still a few women right in my sites and I set off to catch them! One by one I picked them off. I passed the last one at the 6 mile mark. We turned the corner and I knew that the finish line was only 2/10ths of a mile up the hill (yes the finish was totally uphill!!). From somewhere deep inside, I pushed the pace up just a notch all the way to the finish line. My husband and 2 kids where there to meet me! That was the BEST part!!! As my husband walked toward me he held up 2 fingers and told me I was second. I was like cool, 2nd in my age group is awesome and was told me no - you are the 2nd woman to cross the finish! I could believe it! At that point, I looked at my Forerunner and it gave me a finish time of 47:29 and a pace of 7:32 I almost fell over right there but my kids just had to show me what they could do on the playground - it was a perfect ending!

I had intended to use this race as a challenging training run so that I could gauge where my fitness level is. Today has passed my wildest dreams! I've always known that I was a good runner and the more I compete in races the more I wonder just how far I can push myself. This year, I want to run more consistently and compete in more races than in previous years. I am also hoping to run in my first marathon. Hopefully this is the first step toward a really great year of running!

Congrats to Julie Berg who just completed the McNaughton 100 in under 28 hours 30 minutes and took first place. I don't think I'll ever run that far at one time. Every one who runs in those races (whether they are able to finish or not) are amazing! Way to go Julie!!!

Off to play with the kids! Have a blessed evening - I know I will!

Pre-race jitters are starting!

I woke up this morning just like I usually do and was feeling pretty good. Now that I've gotten on the computer though, I can feel that nervousness starting to kick in. It isn't a bad feeling - I actually kind of like it. My biggest concern on these days is the bathroom. I really have a tendency to need the bathroom when I run. I don't know what it is about my body but I always seem to have to take a dump during my long runs. I've had to move my weekend long runs to a local park area that has port-a-pots. I mapped myself out a figure-8 type course that passes the bathroom over and over again just in case I have to stop. I would much rather be out on the roads and see the different scenery when I run but every time I do that (for long runs) I get out there in no mans land and have to go.

Other than that I'm confident about the day. I know I can run the distance (10K). The course is a loop course and it is in a hilly area. From the race description, it sounds as if the beginning is downhill and the end is uphill. But it is in a really pretty area so I'm going to do my best to ignore the hills, enjoy the scenery and run by butt off. I don't really have a goal time in my head but a lot of my training runs (with walking) have been between 8:30 and 8:50 pace - I'm planning on running the whole distance so if I can be between 8:15 and 8:30 I'll be pleased.

Well, off to eat a good breakfast!

Reality is back with a vengeance!

Last week was such a tease - because I was on spring break, I was able to get on the computer and get my blog updated as well as many other computer "things" that I love to do. This week has been a totally different story. I feel like I haven't been able to keep up with 1/2 of the things I wanted to do.

But, at least I will get an entry in today - I'll worry about tomorrow.......later!

This week has been a step-back week for me in terms of my running. Tomorrow, I have signed up for a 10K run. I realised recently that I have never run in a 10K race. I've done 5Ks, 15Ks and a 1/2 marathon but no 10Ks. I decided it was time! My goal for the race is pretty much just to run it. My training has consisted of using a run:walk technique for any distance over 5 miles. So tomorrow, my main goal is going to be just running the entire distance and if I can keep my pace between 8:30 and 8:45 I will be happy!

Today is also going to be a busy day. My kids have their first T-ball game along with pictures and the league's opening ceremony. I was also asked to be an assistant coach so I have to be there for everything. The bad part is that we have to be at the field at 8:30 for the pictures and ceremony (also not sure when the ceremony is supposed to take place) and then our game isn't until noon. The head coach hasn't really given us any information about what the day is going to be like. I'm hoping that the pictures and the ceremony will be over early and that we will be able to leave and get some lunch before the game starts. They are also at different fields so regardless of what the timing is like, we will have to leave for another field after the ceremony. Nothing can ever be easy can it?!

Yesterday took its toll........

.....on my eating and on my energy level. I am exhausted this morning! I got up to exercise, like I normally do, and was scheduled for 60 minutes of cross-training. I did not get it done - I'm hoping to do something a bit later. The weather isn't cooperating either. We are in the midst of a really big rain storm. There are flood warnings in effect and it looks like it is going to rain for the next 3 days. So, I'm not sure just how much running I'll be getting done in the next few days. I will just have to get on the bike and do my Cardio Coach workouts.

My eating was pretty crappy yesterday as well. I burned lots of calories yesterday but also ate lots of processed foods - I was out most of the day but that is no excuse. I should have planned a bit better and had better options at my disposal. But, yesterday is over and all I can do is make today the best it can be. I will be drinking lots of water to help get all that junk out of my system and I will be making sure that I do MUCH better with my food choices. The day has started off better in that respect. I have had a nice balanced breakfast and will continue that in the meals to come.

I also need to keep my leverage in mind. If I don't make my goal my money will be helping an absolutely awful group of people! I need to focus on that and get everything back on track!

What a great day!

The day started out with a great run - it was my long run for the week (8 miles). I decided to try taking in some fuel during this run. I tried some Sports Beans at about 30 minutes into the run. They tasted good but I wonder if they would be too hard to eat multiple times while running. The good news is that I didn't notice any stomach problems after I ate them. If anybody out there is actually reading this and has any input on fueling during long runs I would love any feedback you could offer.

I'm not sure if it was the fuel but I had a great run. My pace was 8:34/mile - significantly faster than last week. It felt harder than last week but not to the point where I felt like I was really struggling. I just felt like my legs were a touch tired. Then after I got home, we decided to take the kids to the Philadelphia Zoo. We figured that we did a good 2 hours of actual walking - I just thought my legs were tired during the run (LOL).

My eating hasn't been great today - doing lots of eating out and on the run. I will definitely try to clean it up the rest of today and definitely tomorrow.

I can't believe it!

After the crappy nutrition day I had yesterday, my weight didn't increase. I thought for sure that it would be up quite a bit. Today needs to be MUCH better. The good thing is, that the weather is better today to I'll be able to get out and do things. I'll be doing my second (official) session of my Muscle Audio together with the LL Muscle Professor.

I'm not sure if I will be getting a cardio session in today because I have A LOT of paper mache to do today. That needs to be my focus for the day because I have to get them finished for Monday and it is supposed to rain on Sunday so I don't want to be fighting the weather. If I get most of them (if not all of them) finished today it will have all day tomorrow to dry before the damp weather moves in. Hanging them outside has been great! I actually finished my "egg" and put a coat of paint on it. I wanted to see how much the paint would get soaked into the paper. There was no soaking in at all - one coat of paint on the outside will be perfect! I really hope the kids like doing this project. Next year, if I do it again, I'll start earlier and have the other teacher help by doing some too.

I had a great lifting workout this morning! My ipod ran out of steam 1/2 way through but my husband had already left for work so I turned up the computer and listened to the rest of the workout from there. It really does make a difference in my lifting. I did 2 sets without the audio (before I thought about listening to it on the computer) and I just didn't feel like I got the same intensity out of it. It is almost like you have a training partner right there spurring you on to better things. That is probably the thing I miss most about training at home - no one to push you or spot you. But, it is what it is and I need to work with what I have.

Well, I've taken enough rest time. I have finished 2 more "dino eggs" (my paper mache) so I only have 17 more to go!

Not a good day......

My eating has been pretty poor today! I have eaten so much crap - I'm not really sure what was going on but I just couldn't seem to stop eating it all. Then on top of that my son has been acting like a real pain in the...... I finally had enough and snapped. He ended up with no bedtime story and no night time TV. Some good did come out of it though - I had an awesome run. I went about 3 miles in a pace of about 7:15/mile. Those exercise sessions that you use to burn off that frustration and anger can be some of the best ones.

I'm still really struggling with the food today but I will make it through. I now officially have $50 riding on it. The check was sent to my friend and will be sent if I don't make my 135 weight. That is not an option so I will get back on my horse and have a good day tomorrow!

The Good and the Bad

The bad first: I ate way too much yesterday. It was a really funny thing though because I knew I was eating things that I hadn't eaten in a long time but there really wasn't a time when I stuffed myself. It was more of an absent-minded eating situation. When the day was all said and done, I knew my weight would be going up and it did (from 137.5 to 139). I'm not freaking out about it though. I had a great time yesterday but now that the day is done, it is time to get back to work. I have a leverage that I cannot and will not break. I am writing the check and sending it to Katrina today!

Now the good: my muscles are sore today! Why is that good? It means that I had an effective lifting session yesterday. My legs are sore and I can definitely feel my back muscles but my forearm/elbow isn't really all that sore. I still have discomfort when I pick things up in a certain position, but it is definitely getting better.

Today's run was pretty good. It was a bit tough to get started because my legs are sore but overall it felt good. My pace was around 8:30/mile for 3 miles. I then added about 15 minutes of fast walking. I still want to get some more time in (maybe later on the bike) but I had to get back to the house because my husband had to leave for work.

Today's food: I have my plan all set. I will be throwing away all the "extra" stuff in the house and I will be writing and mailing my leverage check today. I feel very confident that I will be back on track TODAY!!!

Back into Lifting! 4/8/07

Happy Easter!

I just finished up a great lifting session. I used the LL Muscle Audio and it was really cool! Coach David offered a free trial download to all Club Lifestyle members so I gave it a try. He was right, if you enjoy using Cardio Coach for your aerobic sessions you'll love the Muscle Audio for your lifting sessions. Having him right there in your ears the whole time keeps you right on track - it keeps your pace nice and steady and helps you get through each and every rep. The other cool feature is that you can use it in conjunction with the Muscle Professor on site. That way your workouts progress at a great rate too. Very cool!

However, I still need to keep the weights moderate because of the tendinitis in my elbow. It has definitely gotten better but it is still hanging around. I'm debating whether I should contact the MD about it or just wait and see how it goes. I'm leaning toward waiting a bit, getting back into my routines, and then see where it goes from there.

The other great news is that my weight dropped to 137.5 today. I'm sure it will go up a touch after today, because I plan on allowing myself some treats today. I don't want to go overboard but I also want to enjoy the day. The really tough part will come later this week when there is all the kid's candy laying around the house. I tried to keep our candy to a minimum but I know the kids are going to get a boat-load from my husband's sister and by my parents. Last year is was an obscene amount of candy!

Anyway, I need to go make and eat my HEALTHY breakfast. Enjoy your day and have a Blessed Easter! Remember the Reason for the Season!!

I had one of THOSE workouts.........

ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE!!!

I felt like I was floating on air. I ran 7 miles using a run:walk (9:1minutes) technique and still had an average pace of 8:50 per mile. I couldn't believe it!! I knew I was having a good run because every time I looked down at my Forerunner my pace read in the 8:30 range. I did not feel like I was going that fast.

When I do my long runs, I just let my body choose the pace. I don't really shoot for anything in particular I just let my legs and my breathing let me know how fast to go. I just can't describe how awesome today was.

I also realised something while I was running. The miles just fly by when I use the run:walk technique. I pretty much focus on smaller 10 minute segments and before I know it, I'm more than 1/2 way done the workout. I think it is also helping my legs by adding in the walks. I could feel some fatigue toward the end of the workout but when you only have a mile or so left you can mentally just push yourself through the rest of the workout. Besides, if I didn't feel some tiredness it wouldn't be a sufficient workout - you need to constantly push yourself just a touch if you want to progress.

Well, I guess that's it for now. I'm off to enjoy this feeling I have. Reality will hit again tomorrow - trying to avoid all the sugar that will be flying around. At least 2 Easter egg hunts and 3 baskets each for the kids. I really need my leverage to keep me on the straight path right now!!

Pre-exercise Check-In 4/7/07

Today is my long run and I will be leaving for the course in a few minutes. I took my NO-Explode and am just giving it a few minutes to settle into my system. I am very pleased to say that I'm actually starting to see the scale move. I'm down to 138.5 this morning! It is amazing what a good leverage can do!! Do YOU want to know more about leveraging? If the answer is yes then please check out the LL site and the LL book. It will be so worth your time effort and money!! I started with Body for Life and still think it is a good starter program but LL is just plain better. Coach David isn't afraid to tell you the truth - the entire truth - about weight loss and getting fit. It is a lot of work and it is just plain hard at times! The the feeling you get when you are doing the program correctly is AMAZING! I'm not at my current goal but the feeling I have right now is awesome - I can't really describe it but I just feel great and so can you!

There is my shameless plug for what I consider the best program around!!! I'm off to get dressed and go for my 7 mile run. Writing all this has gotten me so psyched - I can't wait to start my run!! LATER!

Week in Review 4/6/07

This week has been pretty good on the exercise front. I've gotten in 9.5 miles of running (with another 7 on tap for tomorrow) plus 2 more days of cross-training. Today is supposed to be a rest day but I think I'll try to get out for a walk or something a little later - nothing super strenuous but I still want to do something.

My eating has been better the past 2 days. I decided or a leverage for my current goal (I think I wrote about it on a previous post) and it has already started to pay dividends. There were a number of times yesterday when I wanted to go trolling but stopped and thought about my check being sent to an organization that I despised and having to tell my husband that the group would now have our name and address. It stopped me right in my tracks - I will make my goal!!

The added benefit is that I've actually started to see some drops on the scale. I know that I've definitely started to feel better and carry myself in a more positive way since I've gotten back into the groove this past couple of weeks. As a nice little reward for myself, I'm actually taking the time this morning for a nice little hair color touch-up. I'm not really one to do things for myself so it always feels kind of weird when I do take the time for me. I know that is not a good way to be but it is what it is. I've tried to make those goals of doing something for me but then I look at the money it would cost and I wimp out and don't do it. I know there are "free" things I could do but such is life I guess. The weird/sad part is that my husband wouldn't care if I went out and spent some money on myself - it is all on my shoulders. I'm doing it to myself.

I took a break while writing this to finish my hair. It looks good but it is probably a shade too dark. I don't like hair that look like there is an abrupt change. Also when you go too dark it looks "fake" - yes I know it is fake but you don't want it to look that way! Next time I touch up my hair I will definitely go a shade lighter.

I'm really looking forward to the next week. We are on Spring Break! We don't have a lot planned but we are going to take the kids to the Baltimore Aquarium. I haven't been there since I was a little kid and am really looking forward to it as well. Speaking of kids - I hear mine starting to stir so I will end this entry.

Saturday 3/31/07

I had a great 6 miler this morning. The weather was cold but not bitter and windy. I don't mind running when it is cold but I hate running in the wind! The best part was the beautiful sunrise I was able to witness. Words can't really express (at least not mine) how beautiful it was. I happened to pass a gentleman, coming toward me, right after I really noticed how pretty it was. He was just starring at it too.

I was also pleased with the effort of the run. I started out using the run 9 min/walk 1 min technique but then finished the last couple miles just running. My pace ended up being about 8:50/mile for the 6 miles - even with the walking bouts.

Then I ended up spending about 1.5 hours helping clean up one of the local baseball fields. My kids Tball league was having a field clean-up day. I worked my butt off this morning - I have the blisters to show for it. I ended up eating too much as a result (I felt super hungry all day long) so I will definitely have to buckle down this week.

I set a goal, at Club Lifestyle, of losing 6 pounds in 7 weeks so I have my plan all printed out. I need to sit down and create my specific meal plans but I'm feeling good about the direction I'm heading. There is a 10K I want to sign up for and I still need to pick my charity for my leverage but I definitely feel like I'm making progress.

Time to get ready for bed!

My computer has been tied up

I haven't been on as much as I would have liked because my hubby has been logging some major computer time in the evenings. He is downloading music onto our computer and it is taking a long time to complete the job.

Even though I haven't been on, I've been doing pretty well this week. I've completed all my workouts and have even been able to start back with a little bit of lifting. My eating has also been a bit better the past couple of days. I've decided on a pretty good leverage: I'm going to write a check, about the cost of my marathon registration (I can't seem to find exactly how much the registration is going to be so I'm guessing), and if I don't make my weight loss goal a friend will send the check to charity. If I make the goal she will send the check back and I will have the money for the race. If I don't make it I will basically be paying double just to run in the race. I also need to decide on a charity - preferably one that I don't particularly like so that I will be more focused on reaching my goal!

Tomorrow is my long run for the week (6 miles). Today was supposed to be an off day by my son wanted to go on a hike so the whole family went out to the trails in a local park and walked/hiked for just under an hour. I'm really proud of how well the kids did. We went up a couple of really steep hills and they buckled down and made it up with just a little bit of help. It was really cool to watch them be so determined to get up the hill!

Speaking of the kids - time to get them to bed!

I think I added a ticker

I just added in the code for a ticker at the top of my blog and I'm hoping that after I post this message it will still be there.

Here it goes!

OK, it was still there so it works - YEAH! I wish I could center it on the page but I'm not going to worry about that. It was too hard to figure out how to get it there in the first place.

Sunday 3/25

I had a really good run this morning. I went 6 miles and my pace was around 9:25 /mile. I'm using a run - walk technique on my long runs. My friend Katrina uses it and we are planning on using this technique when we run our marathon. We want to run it together so I'm trying to get used to the technique. We are using a ratio of 9 minutes of running to 1 minute of walking. It is somewhat hard to adjust to the slower paces but I have a feeling it will be better for my legs in the long run. I've decided that I'm not going to use it for any runs shorter than 5 miles.

Nutrition has yet again been a struggle today. I can't figure out why I'm having such a hard time staying away from the CRAP! But, tomorrow is another day and I will continue to strive for a better day.

If there is anyone out there who actually reads my blog & knows computer "stuff", I have a question for you. I would like to add a chart to my sidebar where I can update my running mileage. I think it would be cool to watch my mileage change over the course of a year. However, I can't figure out how to get one on the sidebar. Also, I never know where to add things in the code so that it doesn't mess up the rest of the screen. Any help would be appreciated!

Trying to be more consistent - with everything!

As the title suggests, I'm going to try and write more consistently and stick to my program more consistently too. If there are any regular readers out there, please feel free to check up on me and demand regular check-ins. I love the accountability!!

This morning didn't really start the way I had planned - I forgot to set my alarm so I woke up about 45 min. later than I had planned. I had decided, last night, that I would do my Drill Max DVD instead of my bike so when I got up I went down and did my workout. I finished about 50 minutes of the DVD before my son and husband came downstairs. I had originally wanted to get 60 minutes completed but I didn't think it was fair to them to have to sit there and watch me exercise to a DVD.

This particular workout combines cardio and some weight training. It was the first weight training I had done in a while because of my arm. So far it feels pretty good so I'm really hoping that I will be able to get back into my lifting soon. The arm is not completely healed - still have some discomfort on and off - but I'm encouraged by the progress.

I've been trying some new supplements lately - by BSN and they taste very good! I've been using the NO-XPLODE (not sure how much of an effect it makes). It is a pre-workout energy igniter and the literature states that you will feel the energy and the focus is about 30 minutes. However, most of the time I don't really feel much change. Not sure if I need a bigger dose or if it just doesn't work for me. I'm not usually affected much by things like caffeine so there is a good possibility that it just won't do much for me. However, the product I'm most excited about is their protein powder Syntha-6. Yesterday I tasted the Vanilla Ice Cream flavor and it was out of this world! I also have sample packets of Chocolate and Strawberry and am very excited to give them a try. I'm also hoping that they make variety packs of these but I have a feeling they don't. If they don't, I have quite a bit of protein powder to finish up before I get anymore. However, when I do finish them I will definitely get some of the BSN flavors.

Nutrition has been my biggest problem. I've been making my plans but not sticking to them. I have been munching during the afternoons and that needs to stop. It hasn't been bad food but the volume ends up being too much and I'm not losing any weight. I've actually been staying pretty consistent at about 138. I need to really try and get serious and get myself down to 135. Hopefully, I will then be able to maintain that weight - I think I will feel better there. I know 3 pounds doesn't sound like much but it can make a difference in my clothes.

Time to get the day started.

Last night was a great run!

Jen Rhines

Yesterday morning was not a good morning energy-wise. I felt exhausted so I decided to not go out and exercise. In some ways, I think it was a big mistake I agree with Coach David when he says that if you just don't feel like exercising you should probably go anyway - you'll feel better afterwards. But on the other hand, I think it is also important to listen to your body. It can make for a rough inward dialog!

Anyway, I knew that I needed to make a point of getting out for a run. I'm looking to run in a 10K next month and then my normal 15K and hopefully the Marine Corp Marathon in October (hopefully some others over the summer as well). I've been doing a lot of bike training and need to start getting some miles on my legs. Well, after letting dinner settle, I got myself out on the road and felt really good. I ran my scheduled 3 miles at a pace of just over 8 min/mile.

I've also started my strengthening exercises for my arm. It was a bit sore yesterday but feeling pretty good today. I called the MD to get a refill on my Naproxen prescription just to make sure that I totally wipe this thing out. I'm hoping that I will be able to start some really lifting next week. I will start light and work my way up.

Today has been OK - it is a cross training day so I did just under 30 minutes of Taebo this morning and will get on my bike a bit later today. Eating has been OK so far today too. This is the area that I've been struggling the most with. My body really wants to stay at my current weight - about 138. I'm trying to decide whether I want to stay here for awhile or whether I want to push my way through to 130-135 and then try and stay there.

I'll try and update later on how my 2nd workout went.

Addendum:

Well the evening completely got away from me. I ended up finishing up my homework instead of getting my 2nd exercise session completed. To be honest, I'm not sure where my priority lies with those two choices. I am learning a great deal with my class and I need to have the credits for my job (so I need to do well). The problem is, there is a lot of homework involved with the class - lots of reading a writing article reviews and observing children in different situations with write-ups. It isn't really "hard" work but it is time consuming and right now we are in the meatiest section of the course - Child Development. I'm not happy that I didn't get the extra workout in but I'm content with my decision. Tomorrow's workout will depend on the weather. If it is not raining, I'm going for a 6 mile run. If it is raining I will do a 60 minutes Cross on my bike.

Inconsistent

The title is perfect for not only my posting but also for my fitness program. I have been dropping lots of bucks to my hubby because I haven't been following my program. For every goal I don't check off. on my LL list, I owe my hubby $5. There is a bunch of dollars not going into my savings fund because of my inconsistent performances. I really wish I could put my finger on the reasons for my problems. I've been struggling with them for quite some time now. A couple of times I thought I had it all figured out only to find myself struggling again in less than a week. But, as I posted before, I will never give up so if you look at the big picture I'm ahead of the game. Now all I have to do is get the smaller picture in better focus.

The positive for today has been my workout. I was supposed to run 5 miles today but we had a descent ice storm yesterday so the roads were a mess. I decided to sleep in a bit (I slept until 7am and I can't remember the last time I stayed in bed that late - it felt GREAT! I think I needed it.) and then did a bike workout in the afternoon. I really busted my butt for 55 awesome minutes. It also appears that the roads have cleared enough for me to run tomorrow morning before church. I may have to do a lot of little loops in my neighborhood but I need to start getting those miles in on my legs. My cardiovascular conditioning is pretty good (at the MD's the other day my heart rate was 56 bpm) but I need to get my legs used to the pounding of running.

My friend Katrina runs her 1/2 marathon tomorrow and I can't wait to hear how she does. We are planning on signing up for the Marine Corp Marathon in the fall so she has a great base under her already. I know I wouldn't be able to cover that distance right now. However, I can usually get up to speed relatively quickly if I can get out on the roads consistently - I am SO ready for the weather to get warmer and stay warmer!

Update

Maybe in some small way I'm being rewarded for my efforts today. It appears that the car had a battery problem. The tow truck driver got the car started and told my husband that the problem was most likely a dead battery - no guarantees mind you. Nevertheless, my husband put in a new battery and it started like a dream. Now let's all keep our fingers crossed that it stays that way!

I'm on my LAST nerve!!

I'm really trying to be good and not turn to food like I usually do when I'm stressed - so I'm writing instead. It all started (well maybe not "all") first thing this morning. I got up about 4:45am so that I could wake up a bit and then go out for a run. Well, at about 5:10am my 4 year old son comes walking down the steps. Needless to say, I wasn't able to get out for my run first thing. That wasn't too bad because I just went a bit later when my husband got up. The bad part is that my son's behavior is awful when he doesn't get enough sleep - everything is a major catastrophe and tears flow at the drop of a hat. After a while it REALLY grates on your nerves!

Then, just as we were leaving the local fire station (picking up new batteries - don't forget to change your smoke detector batteries and your clocks) the van decides to just stop working. It is some sort of electrical problem but it just isn't something I want/need to deal with right now. My husband is trying to figure it out right now but my gut is telling me I'm going to be without a car for a while. Not having a car would be a major problem come Monday! The car has acted funny the past week or so, so I guess it is our own fault but the problems were with things like the windows. One of the power windows wouldn't work and then all of a sudden it worked. I thought it was a motor problem in the door at first but now that this has happened I'm thinking the problems are related.

Then, after running home to get the other car (got me some extra exercise - I guess that is a plus) we got home and my son had yet another meltdown and got sent to his room. Then, not 5 minutes after I let him out of his room he has another one. I try to keep telling myself that it is because he is tired and because he is 4 years old. But, it isn't making it any easier to deal with!!

Well, I guess this has helped a bit. I'm still very frustrated but I don't I'm going to raid the frig. Plus, "my Flyers" just scored a shorthanded goal to go up 3-1 over the Boston Bruins. I just wish the Flyers were having a better year!

I'm Famous!

Not really but a friend of mine interviewed me for her husband's fitness website. I thought it turned out pretty well. Hopefully, I don't come off as too much of a dork - but even if I do it is who I am and I'm proud of me!

Hope you enjoy the article and even get some useful information from it. By the way, the website is pretty new but I know they are working very hard to get some really great info on it. Enjoy!

http://www.osxfitness.com/cheryleinterview.html

Just a quick note

I finally got out for a run this morning. I added some fast paced walking and was able to get out there for about 50 minutes. It felt good to be out and running again. I am going to look up some 10K training programs and go for it.

My eating has been great today. I've had 4 of my 6 meals and they have all been according to plan.

I don't plan on owing my husband any money again today!!

Peace.

Today has been great so far!

I had some eye openers today. The first one happened while I was watching "Handy Manny" with my son (that's a TV show by the way). The show was talking about making mistakes. I realised that was what was going on in my fitness plan - I was making LOTS of mistakes. However, one positive thing about the situation is that I'm not giving up in any way shape or form. The other positive point is that I am trying to learn from this time in my life. I know that if I just keep working at it I WILL reach my goals. It may not happen tomorrow but it will happen!

The other eye opener was when I put my jeans on today. They were a pair that not too long ago were quite loose but not anymore. They were tight everywhere - the waist, the seat and the thighs. I really hated that feeling. Right now I'm at 140 and I need to be between 130 & 135! The really funny thing is that even though I knew what the scale said, I kept telling myself that 5 pounds isn't that big a deal and yes, a couple of outfits were a bit more snug than they used to be, I still look good in my clothes and I'm probably a lot better off than most of the population. WHAT STINKIN' THINKIN'!!!! I'm heavier than I should be or want to be and I need to make some changes and make them NOW!!

I had an awesome Cardio Coach workout (vol. 6 is great)! It lasted about 50 minutes and it was really challenging. I've also got a leverage system working thanks to Allie over at LL. I'm using my checklist and for every item that I don't mark off at the end of the day, I will give my husband $5. That can become VERY expensive if I don't follow through. I'm also trying to save for a special present for myself and every dollar that goes to him doesn't make it into my savings fund. I love this for a couple of reasons: 1. The leverage is a daily event and not something that I can skip today with the thought "I'll make it up tomorrow" & 2. It is taking me further away from something I really want. Something that I want badly enough that I've started to save a year in advance for it! I am going to use this leverage system until the end of March and see where it takes me - if all goes well and it is a system that works for me I may very well continue it!

My nutrition has also been great today. I've stuck to my plan without fail and haven't had any "cheats". I've even decided to forgo my usual "splurge dessert" because I've had way too many splurges this week as it is. Also, by skipping the splurge, I will make sure that I complete all my checkoffs for the day.

I downloaded some more music today and I want to go out and try it. It was a podrunner podcast and he puts together mixes according to heart rate. I actually got 2 downloads at different speeds and want to try out each both while I'm walking or running and also on the bike. I figure if I can supplement my main workout with the podrunner material it will only help my cause.

One bad thing is that I think I've developed some tendinitis in my right elbow. It has really been bothering me lately. I'm going to take the week off from lifting and see how it feels. The world can't be all roses - right?!

Boy has it been a long time!

I have had the darnedest time finding the time to get everything I like to do done! As a result, my blog has been neglected lately. It's funny, not too long ago I seemed to be able to get everything I wanted to do done. I was exercising (many times multiple sessions), taking care of the family, doing my prep work for school and doing a little bit of house cleaning (notice I said a LITTLE bit - I really don't like to clean the house so it's always last - LOL). Even with all that, I was still able to keep up to date with my LL logs and keep my blog up to date. Now, I'm struggling with most of that list.

I have been trying to evaluate why things are the way they are and I don't seem to be getting anywhere with it. I feel like I should be able to just flip that switch and get back on track but it isn't turning out to be that easy. My main focus today was to make sure I got in a good workout first thing this morning and I accomplished that! I did 30 minutes of Drill Max. I wanted to try and get a bit more in later but the day didn't work out that way - lots of errands to get done. I am happy with that part of my day though. My goal was to get the workout in early and I did that. Food was so-so, mostly because I forgot to bring both my snack and my lunch to work. I really could have kicked myself!

Tomorrow is another day and I will again make a goal of exercising first thing in the morning. If the weather is nice I will be trying to get out for a run. It has been a long time since I've been on a run, mostly because of bad weather. If the weather doesn't cooperate I will do Vol. 6 of Cardio Coach on my bike.

Wednesday 2/21/07

Something happened today that told me I'm getting back into a good groove. I have had one of those nights where you get so mad and frustrated that all you want to do is curl up with a nice bag of junk food and eat the whole thing. However, I did not succumb to this feeling! Instead, I went out to my bike and did my Cardio Coach workout. This act is very good for me - I also gave up sweets for Lent so sitting down with the junk was not an option.

Here is a question though: why can I give up sweets for Lent, without much difficulty, but during the rest of the year I struggle to go 1 day without the junk? I don't understand it.

Well time is short and I have lots to do.

My New Team Has Started!

I joined a team over at LL - the teams can be a great motivator because there is lots of support. There is also the responsibility to not let your team down. The team leader actually wrote and posted a team contract which I thought was a great idea. I printed it out just to remind myself of the promises I gave when I signed up for the team. Too many people make promises with no intention of keeping them - I don't intend to be one of those people. I promised to be a part of this team so I will:

1. Do my absolute best to stay on plan every day.
2. Take responsibility for my own actions and not make excuses.
3. Be honest and give support to my teammates and cheer their success as they will do the same for me.
4. Not drop out!!

The team started yesterday and so far I've had 2 good days (today isn't over but I DO NOT plan on messing it up). I've had to deal with some bad weather (ice/snow storm so no outside exercising) but yesterday I completed and hour exercise tape and today I've completed my lifting session. I still want to get in about 30 minutes of CV, which I will do shortly.

I'm feeling better about things right now. My attitude has been better - I'm afraid it is still going to be a battle for a while but I'm hoping that by being on the team I will have the extra motivation that will get the ball rolling. I honestly believe that if I can get a couple of really good weeks under my belt, I will get into a good groove and be able to follow through with all my plans. I really need to make sure to keep the crap out of my diet and do a bit of a detox on my system. It wouldn't surprise me in the least if that was a huge part of my overall problem.

Here's to an awesome day 2 of our LL team!

Change in Focus!

I've continued to try and evaluate what in the world has been going on with myself. It really isn't like me to be in a funk this long. What I came up with is that everything started spiraling out of control when I tried to back off on my distance running in order to try and build more muscle. When that is occurring, a different mindset is needed in regards to food. When I try to make this switch, something in my brain tells me that I can eat anything and everything I want. I know that isn't true but it is still what happens in my head.

What I've decided to do is to get back to what I know I do best - distance running. I'm not going to give up my lifting (still shooting for 3 days per week) but my focus is going to swing back toward the running. I've pulled off 2 10K training programs from Hal Higdon's site. One of them is an intermediate program and the other is an advanced program. I think I'm going to do them back to back (intermediate and then the advanced) which will give me 16 weeks of good consistent mileage.

A friend of mine from LL has spoken about doing a marathon together in the fall. I'm really considering taking her up on that challenge as well. I'm thinking that the 16 weeks of 10K training will give me a good base to then begin the marathon training. My hope is that this whole plan will allow me a nice gradual build up and that it won't wreak too much havoc on my body or my life.

Today was a nice easy 3 mile run with a 3/4 mile walking cool down. I was very cold out (16 degrees F) but is felt great to not only get out and run but to also know that I have a plan. Now all I have to do is work the plan and I'll reach my goal.

It feels really good to know that I have a plan and some direction again. When I started my muscle building phase I thought I had a good plan but when I look back I now have to wonder....but, at least for now I feel like I have focus and purpose and that is an awesome feeling!

Enough is Enough! - update

My day has continued to go well. There have been a few times when I saw something that I wanted to eat but I told myself NO! It isn't on your plan and you will stick to the plan!!!!

So far it has worked but I will admit that I'm feeling a bit hungry even though I just finished a meal. It is probably psychological but it feels real enough. However, I am not going to go off plan. I'm taking this one day at a time and today I will not stray. It may seem extreme but I have to break the cycle and if I have even one little bite I just know I will lose control. So here's to the plan and sticking to it!!!!

Enough is Enough!

I've decided that many of my problems have been caused by my head being up my butt. For some strange reason, I've been feeling sorry for myself and not doing the things I need to do. I'm not sure exactly when or why it started and frankly I don't care. The only thing that matters is that I get my butt up off the sofa and do all the things I need to do!!!!

I WILL be journaling every day, I WILL be performing all my exercise sessions, I WILL be planning all my meals and I WILL be sticking to my plan!

One of the excuses that I've been using is lack of time. It is true that I'm quite busy but so are many other people and they are doing what they need to do. One person I truly admire for this type of situation is Julie B who I met over at LL. Julie runs in the ultra distance races and has to put in lots of miles. I'm not quite sure how she does it with a husband and a family. Julie, if you happen to read this, you are an inspiration to me and many others. Oh, just in case anyone was wondering, she doesn't just run these distances, she runs them VERY well. Well enough to have gotten a sponsor last year. Awesome job Julie!!!

Today has been a good day so far. I got out for a run, even though it was only 11 degrees F. It "was only" 3 miles but it felt great! I didn't worry about the pace, I just wanted to get out and do it. I also made a nutrition plan for myself last night and have been sticking with it so far today. My plan is to just take it one day at a time for now. I will worry about setting longer term goals after I get myself back on track. I know I will be signing up for some running races - maybe even a marathon this fall with my friend Katrina.

I will try to post again later updating the rest of the day.

Week in Review 2/3/07

Well, it was a good week and a bad week. Good in that I got a lot accomplished this week. I was able to get a lot of stuff together for the upcoming month at school, I was able to get all my school assignments finished and I was able to get some of the house straightened up. I've also had a couple of really good conversations with Coach David. He opened my eyes to a few things going on with my life.

The bad part was my exercise and nutrition. I actually lost some weight this week but to be completely honest I'm not feeling very good about my program or my consistency right now. I'm having lots of highs and lows with no in between consistency. I've also come to realize that I'm not really feeling good about myself either. Coach David suggested that I really need to find something for ME because I'm worth it. He is right, I am worth it, but that isn't something that I hear much or say to myself much. I'm trying to come up with something that I can do just for me. Right now I'm leaning toward trying a massage - it is something I've never done and have always wanted to try. If it goes well, I'm going to look into maybe trying to schedule one a week or maybe every other week and then use it for my leverage.

As I said in the beginning - good and bad week. Hopefully it is one that I can learn from and start moving forward in a positive direction. I feel like I've been treading water and going nowhere for a very long time.

I feel like I'm swimming upstream and not making any progress!

I started taking a class a couple of weeks ago and boy has it really messed up my schedule. The class is on Monday nights and is scheduled to end at 9:30 pm. Now, that may not sound very late but I normally go to bed between 9 and 9:30 each night. This past Monday, we didn't end class until about 9:45 and then I still had to drive home. I have felt exhausted all week. I'm sure it will get better over the next couple of weeks but in the meantime I've been struggling with getting my workouts done.

Overall, I'm just plain frustrated with myself. I've been able to drop my weight a bit over the past few days but I just don't feel good about myself right now. I spoke with Coach, at LL, the other day and he said something that really made me sit up and take notice. We were talking about leveraging and how hard it can be to come up with a good strong leverage. He listed many things that the "normal" woman might engage in and I don't do any of them. They were all things that someone would do just for themselves - make themselves feel better, prettier, more relaxed etc and I don't do any of them. I don't do things for me and it isn't because my husband won't let me or anything like that.

Why doesn't a person do things for themselves? Is it because they, deep down somewhere, don't like themselves? Don't think they deserve it? I always thought I liked myself but now I'm starting to wonder. I could just write this whole thing off and just go do something for me but will that really solve the problem? Is there a problem? Does anyone out there have an answer? Because I'm not sure I do.

Saturday 1/27/07

Well, I hit my exercise minute goal this week and I hit my weight loss goal (early in the week) but since then the weight has gone up. As I posted yesterday, I'm really struggling with food and today won't be much better I'm afraid. Tomorrow is my 12 year anniversary and Bill and I are going out to dinner. I know that my celebrations shouldn't be based on food but we are going without the kids and it is our day so I'm going to eat without worrying about it and I will probably have dessert. As I sit here and type this I'm not really sure how I feel about this idea.

It has been a few hours since I started typing this post. I've decided that I will not go nuts at dinner. I'm going to enjoy the dinner and have dessert but I'm really going to try not to stuff myself - maybe only eat 1/2 of what is given to me.

I'm also toying with the idea of trying to just maintain my current weight for a while. I'm just a couple of pounds over my high school weight and I know that I look pretty good. I'm trying to figure out whether I'm frustrated right now because I truly want to lose weight or whether I'm just struggling with the concept of getting out of weight loss mode and into maintenance. In some ways, I feel like I need to continue to challenge myself but on the other hand I need to determine whether my weight is the challenge I need to deal with right now. There are many things going on in my life right now and maybe it would be a good time to concentrate on other things and then just work on maintaining the weight.

Coach Dave, at LL, has a program called ELITE. It costs a fair amount of money and I don't have it right now. I was thinking about saving my money over the next year and applying for the program next year. My thinking is this, if I can maintain my weight for the next year I will have a really good base at my current weight (since most people put all their weight on in the first year after losing the initial weight). My body will be used to this weight, and if I get into the intensive program my hope is that many of the "demons" I'm fighting now will not be as big a problem.

Boy am I of 2 minds about all this. I know I really need to find some sort of event or goal to shoot for. The problem hear is that I'm of 2 minds about that also. I've always been an endurance type athlete so I decided a while back that I would try to shift gears and go for muscle growth instead of a lot of distance running. The problem here is that there really isn't an event to train for (I don't have any desire to get on stage). I guess I could go back to training distance and I may do that as the weather gets warmer. A friend of mine from LL suggested that we could train for the same marathon and then run it together. I have to admit that running a marathon has always been a goal.

Boy have I done a lot of rambling here - lots of different thoughts. That is pretty much how my brain feels right now. I've got lots of ideas and thoughts and none of it is really messing together right now. I'm not really sure where all this is leading or where I'll end up but I will keep plugging along in one form or another.

I'm Frustrated!

Let me start with the good - my RT workouts have been kick-butt! I'm stronger right now than I've ever been and I'm really striving, each and every workout to surpass what I did the day before. My CV workouts could be better but that usually happens during the winter months - it is so much harder to get motivated to go outside when the temperature is 12 degrees like it is this morning. I can accept that part because I know my CV will really rev up when the weather starts to warm-up a bit.

The bad part is my eating. It has always been my weaker point - I love the taste of junky food. I could easily sit and eat crap all day long. Yes, I plan my meals most days and even take meals to work with me. However, there are days when there is food at work that I eat (off plan) and days when I grab stuff at home (off plan). The worst part is that I know that I'm doing it and I do it anyway. Some people talk about having just a little nibble of "something" and before they realise what has happened - all of the "something" is gone. That isn't what is happening with me. I know I'm eating something I shouldn't and I tell myself: I don't care I'm going to eat it anyway. The problem is that I do care and I don't want to continue this cycle.

One side of me (the side that has written my current "why") wants to prove to myself that I can do something EXCELLENT. I would love to have the look of a cross between a fitness and a figure competitor. They both have such beautiful and sexy bodies. I love aspects of both of them. To do this, I'm sure I'd need to get my body fat down in the 13ish percent range. This would truly be EXCELLENT for me. But, the other side of me is telling me: "you're just a couple of pounds over the weight you were in high school & you look good in and out of clothes. Why do you want to put yourself through all the trouble of trying to get down that low - it's too much work...." yada, yada, yada.

I have this fight, in my head, each and every day. Add this too everything that I've got going on in my life right now and in many ways it is wearing me down. Who knows, maybe that is part of the reason that I tell myself that I don't care. I really don't have any answers here, I'm just babbling I guess.

The best part though is that I know, deep down in my soul, that regardless of what the answer is I will never stop living this lifestyle. I love how I feel when I'm working out and working out hard. Will I always have this struggle with food? I don't know but my gut says probably. This seems to be a very abrupt end to this entry but when you don't have any real answers is there any type of good ending?

Wednesday - Thursday (1/24-25)

Wednesday's are very busy these days. Immediately after work, I'm training a co-worker. She had pretty advanced arthritis (along with other physical challenges) and wants to get stronger so that she will be better able to play with her grandkids. It's been a while since I've worked with clients (I used to work in a fitness club/physical therapy clinic) but I'm LOVING it! It isn't bringing in a lot of money but it is a start. I would love to have a few more people to work with and maybe it will be a reality someday.

Anyway, after getting home from that, there was a lot to get done in a short amount of time. I was able to get my workouts finished but I had to do it in spurts. I did a couple of CV sessions on the bike and then did my lifting session, also in a couple of sessions. There just wasn't enough time, in a big chunk, to get it all done at once. I figured anything done, even if it had to be in small blocks of time is getting me closer to my goals.

Today is turning into the same type of day. I got a 20 minute run in this morning but had to come back to the house because my dh had to leave for work early (he had to be there at 6 am). I will try to get another session in this afternoon. The only thing that makes that hard is that I have a picture session at church for our directory. That appointment is at 5:50 pm so I'll really be scrambling around after dinner to get everyone ready. I have no idea how long the session will take - hopefully not long.

I've got to run and pick my daughter up from school. Later!!

I've been so busy lately!

I can't believe how crazy things have been lately. I've been doing well with my exercise sessions and my eating. I've gotten my weight down to 135.5 and am very pleased with my progress.

Hopefully I will be able to get on and write more later.

I'm still moving forward!

I had a rough day the other day but I didn't let it get me down or off my game. I just admitted that I slipped and got right back on my LL program the next day (slipped at night). I kept very clean the next day, drank all my water and had a great workout. The next time I got on the scale I had dropped 2 pounds. I'm now down to 136.5.

My days have been very busy and they are about to get busier. I'm starting an evening class on Monday. It has been quite some time since I took any classes so I'm a bit nervous but also a bit excited. It is a class I need for work and I've been told that it is going to be a lot of work. However, I'm hoping that it will really help me be a better teacher. The big down side to it is that it is going to last 20 weeks.

Speaking of busy - I've gotta run!

THIS WEEK HAS BEEN GOING GREAT!

I have been having an awesome week so far. I took this past weekend and worked on coming up with some very aggressive goals. Then from those goals, I was finally able to come up with a WHY that means something to me. I've even written some affirmations and put them on some 3x5 cards so that I can carry them with me.

I started my lifting program on Monday and will lift 3 times per week. My cardio will consist of mostly running. Since I want to try and gain some muscle I'm trying to run more interval sessions. My legs are pretty sore and tired so I don't know if I'll be able to do the intervals tomorrow but my goal is to do interval runs on Tuesday and Thursday and then do a moderately long run on Saturday. Since this is my first week I may ease off on the runs a bit this week and then pick up another interval session next week.

Tuesday's run was very intense. I ran for about 15 minutes or so and then did 10 hill repeats and then finished it with a 5 minute cool down. My legs are still quite tired and a bit sore (I'm sure from a combo of the running and the lifting). That is the main reason why I think I may just run tomorrow without intervals - I'll just wait and see how I feel tomorrow.

Eating has been very good too. I've managed to drop 2 pounds already and I'm feeling great about the whole situation. I have been a bit hungry the past couple of days. I'm not sure if it is because of the workouts or because my body is adjusting to the decreased calories. I don't know how many calories I was eating each day over the past couple of weeks but it is a heck of a lot more that I'm eating right now.

I also found out today that I got into the class I need for work. I didn't find out about it until late and when I called there was already a waiting list. Fortunately I was second on the list and got in. The class starts Monday and from what I understand it is going to be a lot of work. But, I'm looking forward to it!

Rambling Thoughts 1/12/07

As I sit down to start to write this entry, I’ve just gotten back from an exercise session. It wasn’t super intense – a fast paced walk – but it was a step in the right direction. It was also good for my head because I did a lot of thinking. I must also mention that this may be a bit long as well as scattered in flow. I would love to be able to just sit down and write the whole thing in one sitting. However, I have 2 kids and we all have to go to school (I teach at their school) so I’m writing this in segments.

For the past 7-8 months I have been in an Action Phase (described in more detail in the LL book). I dropped my weight down to the same weight I was in high school. During this period, I also had some immovable goal dates to shoot for. I didn’t realize, at the time, just how motivating they were. In October, I had my 15K race with a pretty ambitious time goal and shortly thereafter, I had my 20th High School Reunion that I wanted to look fabulous for. Then came November, these 2 dates were gone and the Holidays (which also happen to include the birthdays for both my kids) were right around the corner. I found myself without much in the way of goals and I was entering into the Maintenance Phase. This can be a very difficult phase as I’ve found out.

When I was in the Action Phase everything seemed to come so easily. Getting out to exercise was a snap and making proper food choices were no problem. I had my goals, they excited me, and I was going to reach them no matter what! Then came the Maintenance Phase. During this time, I had parties to go to and other parties to plan and throw. I was up late and not eating well. In short, I got out of all my “good” routines. It was at this time that I could really feel myself starting to lose my motivation and drive. I have been struggling to get it back ever since.

My weight has gone up to 140 (5 pounds over my high school weight) and I haven’t been able to really find a goal that excites me. In the beginning, it was all about getting rid of the weight (I started more that 20 pounds heavier than I am right now). I knew I was heavy, I knew I didn’t look good and I knew my clothes didn’t fit. All these things together were enough to light the fire and keep it burning bright! It’s different now. Yes, I’ve gained weight – there only 5 pounds to lose instead of 30 pounds – but since I’m not feeling as bad as when I first started, weight loss alone doesn’t seem to get me going.

I’ve also decided that I have a very hard time dealing with more than one major goal at a time. When I was in action, I pretty much focused on that and not much else. As a result, my house started to get messy and cluttered. Add on all the Christmas “stuff” and the house needed a lot of work. So, about a week or 2 ago, I started getting the house under control – that seemed to be the goal that was firing me up. See the connection? As I was getting fired up about my goal (the house), I was really struggling with the other goal (my fitness). I need to find a way to balance these 2 areas of my life.

Last night, I sat down and started to re-read the LL book – specifically the section on the phases of change. As I read, I decided that right now I’m in the Contemplation Phase (please see the LL book for further explanation – it is well worth the read!). I also came across some really great quotes:

“Action creates motivation, not the other way around.”
“Energy does not precede your Lifestyle choice. Energy succeeds your Lifestyle choice.”
“You have to start. Quit procrastinating!”
“If you want to change your body, start with a change in behavior.”
“It is important that you at least start the Lifestyle. Even if you are not totally ready in your mind.”
“…you don’t have to have the perfect plan to get going.”
You truly must act your way through the stages of change.”

Do I have everything figured out? No. Do I have everything set up and in perfect order for me to get started? No. I did however get out for some exercise this morning and my eating has been better today. I still have to find a goal that really excites me – something more than “just losing weight”. I also feel that I need to get a good handle on my “Why” – more on that to come.

Pictures, stats and other stuff

Wt = 137.5

% Fat = 15.8% (thigh: 13mm; Hip: 14mm; Tricep: 9.5mm)

Fat weight = 21.8#

FFM = 116.2#

I'm not sure that these numbers are completely accurate (I just don't feel like I'm as low as 15.8% fat) but it is a place to start. Measurements that are taken in the future will be taken in the same way so I will be able to compare the numbers.

I've had a good week of exercising. I finished all my max lifting sessions (I won't be lifting for the next week, as per the program, but I will do my CV sessions) and had some really good CV sessions. I got my Cathe DVD (Drill Max) and got to do part of that as well. I think I got through about 3/4 of the DVD. I'm hoping to do the entire workout tomorrow.

I've decided to try and get back to basics with my mental status. I'm trying to "start over". I've made myself a new journal and will really try to journal...STOP I will journal every day. I will plan every day and I will then follow that plan every day!

Today was going really well until this evening. A bunch of things happened and I gave into some stress eating. I'm also going to a friends house tomorrow and there is always a bunch of food when we go so I'm going to need to be VERY careful.

Off to make my plans and write in my journal!

Wednesday 1/3 - RT

Today was my 10 rep max test day. It was really tough, I even got stuck on my decline bench press. I realized after trying my first rep that there was no way I was going to be able to lift that weight. Unfortunately, at that point I was having a VERY hard time getting back up off the bench. The only other person in the house was my 4 yo son who obviously couldn't help. Then the phone starts to ring - figures doesn't it! Long story short, I got up without any major problems and dropped the weight down 5 pounds. I also wasn't able to do as many reps as I would have liked on most of my exercises. It was still all I had but there were a lot of sets that I couldn't even get to the 10 rep mark.

I will be having a spotter on Friday when I do my 5 rep session. That means that I will have to lift in the afternoon so that my dh can help me. I will post my session tomorrow - getting late.

Tuesday (1/2) - CV

Boy did I have a tough time getting going today. Luckily, I didn't have anywhere to go this morning so I took my time and got out when I had a bit more energy. I ran for about 4 miles and my pace was 8:11/mile. I'm pleased with the effort especially because I didn't feel like going out in the first place and because there was a lot of wind which always makes the run harder.

I'm not super sore today which surprises me a bit. I do "feel" it a bit in a couple of places - especially my hamstrings - but I thought it would be worse. I'll probably be sore later on in the week though because the reps go down and the weight goes up.

I'm going to take some pictures and some measurements today or tomorrow so that I have something to compare to later on down the road. I'll be interested to see what the numbers are because I haven't taken any in a while and I haven't been eating all that great over the holidays. I'll try to post them after I take them.

New Year - New Workout!

Today I started my HST program. Today's workout was a max test day for 15 reps. It was pretty hard but there were a couple of exercises I thought I could have done a touch more weight. Tomorrow will be a cardio day. My workout was as follows:

Dumbbell rows: 25# for 18 reps (need more weight here)
Barbell rows: 25# for 18 reps (using EZ curl bar with 25s on each side)
Decline bench: 35# for 15 reps
Incline bench: 30# for 15 reps
Lying tricep ext.: 15# for 18 reps ( using EZ curl bar with 15s on each side)
Dumbbell bicep curls: 25# for 13 reps
Dumbbell squats: 45# for 18 reps (45s in each hand)
Dumbbell stiff-leg. deadlift: 45# for 17 reps (45s in each hand)
Standing calf raises: 50# for 18 reps

I'm pleased with the effort and am really glad to have this program part of the Muscle Professor (MP) program at Club Lifestyle. The MP takes care of planning the workout and progresses the weights according to how I did on the previous workout - AWESOME!